Identify something you want to do but have been avoiding because you might fail, be judged, or not be good enough. That avoidance is armour. The question is not whether the risk is real – it is whether the armour is worth the cost of staying out of the arena.

Think of a recent mistake. Notice whether your internal response is 'I did something bad' (guilt) or 'I am bad' (shame). If it is shame, try to reframe: 'I acted in a way that was inconsistent with my values. That behaviour doesn't define who I am.' Then consider what you want to do differently.

The next time someone shares something painful, resist the impulse to respond with advice or silver linings. Instead, try: 'That sounds really hard.' 'I can understand why you feel that way.' 'I'm here with you.' Notice how different the conversation feels – for both of you.

Identify your primary armour – the strategy you most often use to avoid vulnerability. Notice how often you deploy it in a day. Then ask: what would it cost me to put it down in one specific situation this week?

Identify one condition you have placed on your own worthiness: 'I'll be enough when...' Ask: what would change if you removed that condition right now? Not in a year after the achievement, but today. What would you do differently if you were already enough?

Identify a relationship where you have been holding back – not showing your real feelings, not asking for what you need, not admitting a fear or uncertainty. Choose one small, specific act of vulnerability with that person this week. Notice what happens.

Identify one situation in your work or leadership where you have been performing certainty you don't actually feel. What would happen if you said 'I'm not sure about this – what do you think?' to the people around you? Try it once. Notice the response.