Identify someone whose behaviour you want to change. Before saying anything critical, ask: what do I actually want them to do differently? Is there a way to achieve that without attacking their self-esteem? Most of the time, there is.

Tell three people something specific and genuine that you appreciate about them this week. Not a compliment about appearance – something about who they are or what they do. Notice the difference in how they respond compared to generic compliments.

Think of something you want from someone. Before making your request, write down: what does this person actually want? How does what I'm asking connect to that? Only then make your case – leading with their interest, not yours.

In your next conversation, set yourself a challenge: ask three questions before making a single statement about yourself. Really listen to the answers. Ask follow-up questions based on what you heard. Notice how differently the conversation feels.

Commit to remembering the names of every new person you meet this week. When you are introduced, repeat the name back immediately: 'Good to meet you, [name].' Use it once or twice during the conversation. Notice how people respond.

The next time you feel the urge to win an argument, pause and ask: what do I actually want from this conversation? If it is to be right, ask whether being right matters more than the relationship or outcome. Find one genuine point in the other person's position and acknowledge it before making yours.

Think of a change you want someone to make. Instead of telling them to make it, ask questions that lead them toward the conclusion. 'What do you think would happen if we tried X?' 'Have you ever noticed that Y tends to produce Z?' Let them reach the idea. Then support it as theirs.